Friday, November 15, 2024

A SCARY HALLOWEEN STORY


Dear George, 
I tried to write a Halloween story for my writers group last month, but I got bogged down.  I haven't written any fiction for a long time, and I'd forgotten how challenging it can be.  But I've finally come up with a draft.  I hope it doesn't scare you too much.
Love,
Dave

THE LAST HALLOWEEN 

Ninth-graders Johnny Dark and his pals Molly and Tommy were heading home from their Halloween Eve party, joking around, laughing, nibbling on treats from one another’s bags. Long-time best friends, the three of them had been doing Halloween together since first grade. This year Johnny was dressed as a Samurai warrior; Tommy, a desktop computer; Molly, a bumblebee. Being clad in costumes made them even more playful and kooky than usual. 

Thick clouds covered up the moon, the street was deserted, and they could hear the sound of a dog howling in the distance. Near the middle of the block they came upon an alleyway that they’d never noticed before. “Let’s take this,” Johnny said, “it should go straight to our street.” Molly and Tommy nodded their assent, and the three entered the alley. Unseen by the trio, a tall iron gate silently slid into place behind them, closing off any possible exit. 

The alley, lined with stone walls and topped by a shingled roof, was lighted by torches every 10 or 15 yards. The floor was wet, even slimy, and soon they found themselves pushing through cobwebs that hung from the ceiling. A large rodent scurried in front of them, then disappeared in a crack in the wall. “Let’s go back,” Tommy said nervously, but Johnny pointed to a light in the distance and said they’d soon be at the alley’s end. 

The light grew in intensity as they grew nearer, and soon it was accompanied by the sounds of rhythmic music. The alley did come to an end, but, rather than exiting onto a street, it led the three youngsters into a cavernous room. A large fire was blazing in the middle, and around it were dancing a circle of adults. The women were dressed in identical black witch costumes; the men, red demons. As the young people grew nearer and could make out faces, they suddenly realized that the dancers were teachers from their school. Mrs. Graham, Mr. Ahrndt, Harry Belangi, the principal Mr. Jacobsen, and many more. 

When the dancers noticed their young students, they clapped their hands and beckoned to their students to join them. Johnny’s favorite teacher, Miss Jozwiacki, took him by the hand, drawing him into the circle. The music increased in speed, and Johnny did a dance step he’d learned in gym class. Back and forth, left and right, over and over again. It was more fun to be dancing with his teachers than he would have imagined. 

But after a few minutes the music began to get more strident, and the teachers started chanting, “Wahoom…wahoom…wahoom.” Johnny hoped Molly and Tommy were having a good time and looked around to find them, but they seem to have disappeared. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a wooden platform in the center of the flames. To his horror, Molly and Tommy were on it, chained to upright stakes. Though their mouths were covered by gags, Johnny could hear their muffled screams. 

In a panic, Johnny turned to Miss Jozwiacki. But Miss Jozwiacki had been transformed — gnarled hands, a hunched back, her skin ashen gray, her face, neck, and arms gouged by deep wrinkles. Johnny gasped and backed away, but he was immediately surrounded by a group of threatening dancers. Principal Jacobsen grabbed Johnny by his shoulder. “Come with me, son. This is the best Halloween you’ll ever have.” Miss Jozwiacki added, “Because it’s the last Halloween you’ll ever have.” The last words that Johnny Dark ever heard.

Thursday, November 7, 2024

TEN THOUGHTS I HAD THIS WEEK


 Dear George, 

By and large, the American public is ill-informed and ignorant, hostile and destructive. 

The illustrious voters of the state of Ohio ousted one of the most competent members of the U.S. Senate, elected three extremist pro-life justices to the state Supreme Court, and decisively rejected an issue designed to end gerrymandering in Ohio. 

Neo-Nazis are euphoric. 

The current president and white women voters own some of the blame for this disaster. 

We did survive the first term of the new president (though he appears more unhinged and anti-democratic than the last time around). 

Given advanced age and four long years, the vice-president may take over, an equally (and maybe even more) undesirable prospect. 

The U.S. Supreme Court is going to be a backwards force in the nation for decades.  

It’s possible that the new administration will be so catastrophic that it will mean the end of MAGA Republicanism. 

Katja wants to move to New Zealand though that is far away. 

This could be the last president of our lifetimes, a disgusting way to wind things up. 

Love, 
Dave

Saturday, November 2, 2024

A SWIFTIE EXTRAVAGANZA


 

Dear George, 
I am hopelessly out of touch with contemporary pop music. In its place I spend most of my time these days listening to 1920’s big band music, featuring vocals by Ruth Etting, Annette Hanshaw, Marion Harris, and others. I think this is because this was the music my parents grew up with and I must have been exposed while in my mother’s womb. I do know who Taylor Swift is, of course. Every time I go to the drugstore her image is featured on the covers of most of the weekly entertainment magazines. 

Given that the current news is dominated by toxic political events, I decided to look into one of the more joyous recent happenings, i.e., Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour in New Orleans. She performed in three shows at the New Orleans Superdome on Friday October 25th, Saturday the 26th, and Sunday the 27th. The concerts were a complete success, each of them selling out to approximately 65,000 fans. Based on data from Ticketmaster, about 4.4% of people who tried to buy tickets actually got them. For each show Swift performed the same set of 45 songs in 10 distinct acts in three hours and 20 minutes. The concert features numbers from all of the musical eras in Swift’s 18-year career, from her early country roots to her pop and alternative rock phases. Official ticket prices ranged from $49 to several thousand dollars. Given extremely high demand, presale tickets were sold out within minutes of going on sale, and then they were only available by resale, prices sometimes reaching well over $5000. For the final Sunday show even the worst seats in the house cost over a thousand dollars. The Eras Tour in New Orleans had over $200 million in ticket sales, and it’s believed that Taylor Swift earned about $13.6 million dollars for each of the three shows. Thanks in part to the Eras Tour, Swift is the richest female musician in the world with an estimated fortune of $1.6 billion. 

The city went all out to embrace Taylor Swift and her tour. More than 160,000 people traveled to New Orleans for the three concerts. According to the U.S. Travel Association, the typical fan spent about $1,300 on food, lodging, merchandise, and other expenses, bringing in more than $500 million to the city. New Orleans put on a three-day “Embrace the Culture”concert at Duncan Plaza where fans were dropped off for the shows. Because fans trade Swiftie friendship bracelets with her name on them, a giant 140-foot friendship bracelet was hung from the Superdome. New Orleans police officers were also seen trading friendship bracelets with fans, and even the penguins at the Audubon Aquarium wore Swiftie-style friendship bracelets. Businesses decorated their stores, nearly every bar in the French Quarter had music tied in with the concerts, and the airport provided a karaoke stage for fans. The District Donut shop added nine new donuts, all named after Taylor Swift songs. Concert-themed alcoholic drinks at bars in the Quarter included the Taylorita and the Holy Ground hurricane. Antoine’s Restaurant wrote “Eras Tour 2024” on its signature dessert, baked Alaska. Tour fans and local residents were unanimous in describing Bourbon Street as the cleanest and safest it’s every been. Prior to the tour the governor of Louisiana ordered multiple state agencies to relocate homeless people who lived near areas that concertgoers might frequent “to ensure that New Orleans puts its best foot forward…” (though a federal judge later put a stop to the sweeps). 

Most area hotels sold out during the tour, often charging $800 or $900 a night. A Swift fan from suburban Metairie booked 191 rooms at the Holiday Inn for $500 apiece. Her intent was not to make a profit but to insure that Swift fans could meet and connect, and she re-sold all the rooms that she booked at the same price she had paid for them. The Eras Tour, unfortunately, was a hotbed for ticket fraud, scammers selling invalid counterfeit tickets or arranging to transfer tickets but never delivering. Journalists reported numerous instances of mothers and daughters weeping at the box office because their tickets proved to be fake. 

During “Karma”, her final song on the Tour, Taylor sang a line for her boyfriend, former UC Bearcat and N.F.L. Kansas City Chiefs tight end, Travis Kelce: “Karma is the guy on the Chiefs coming straight home to me.” The fans erupted in cheers. At the end of the show she gave her mom two long hugs and said, “I have been so moved and so blown away by the way that this city has embraced us and welcomed us. So can we all just please say a big, ‘Thank you, New Orleans!’” 
Love, 
Dave