Dark Days

Dear George,

This is truly a dark day in Bengaldom.  Local hopes were never higher than this season.  The Bengals compiled the best winning record in team history (12-4), even after losing starting quarterback Andy Dalton to a fractured thumb.  Having failed to win a playoff game for four years in a row, fans have been not just confident of a playoff victory but have been thinking about tickets to the Super Bowl.  The only hitch was that our first-round opponent was our division nemesis and arch-rival, the Pittsburgh Steelers.  Having tortured the Bengals for decades, the very mention of the Steelers sends shivers up one’s spine.

The  game, of course, was last night.  The Cincinnati offense, under second-year backup quarterback A.J. McCarron, was tepid for the first three quarters, and Pittsburgh led 15-0 by the start of the fourth.  Just as we’d resigned ourselves to another painful disappointment, miraculous things started to happen.  Running back Jeremy Hill plunged for a fourth quarter touchdown, and Mike Nugent added a Bengals field goal with five minutes left.  With less than two minutes in the game McCarron hit wide receiver A. J. Green with a 15-yard touchdown pass, giving the Bengals a 16-15 lead.  We leapt up and down in front of the TV, joyous and astonished that the Bengals’ 25-year playoff victory drought was coming to an end.  Then on the very next play Bengals linebacker Vontaze Burfict intercepted a Steeler pass, seemingly sealing a Bengals victory.  All the Bengals had to do was hold onto the ball for four plays.

As fate would have it, a Steeler defender stripped the football from Jeremy Hill’s hands on the very next play and the Steelers recovered.  Still they were pinned back at their own ten-yard line, and we remained confident the Bengals defense would prevail.  Quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, who’d left the game with a shoulder injury, returned and moved the Steelers toward midfield with a series of short dinks and dunks.  However, with barely half a minute to play Vontze Burfict smashed helmet-first into the Steeler’s star receiver’s head and was penalized fifteen yards for a vicious play.  In the ensuing melee Bengal linebacker Adam (PacMan) Jones was penalized another fifteen yards for shoving a Steeler assistant coach.  The Steelers moved thirty yards down the field on the two penalties, suddenly putting them in easy field goal range.  Their kicker kicked, the ball split the crossbars, and the dreaded Steelers won the game, 18-16, with mere seconds to go.  

Here’s what some of the commentators and principals had to say after the game:     

• Ron Cook, Pittsburgh Post Gazette sportswriter:  “The entire (Steelers) team can thank… some bone-headed stupidity by the Bengals…”  
  Marvin Lewis, Bengals head coach: “Our guys fought their tails off all year … got back and went ahead, and then destructed on ourselves — offense and defense together.  That’s disappointing.”  
  Bengals running back Jeremy Hill (whose fourth quarter fumble contributed to the loss): “It’s on me.  It’s unfortunate.” 
  Adam Jones (penalized 15 yards near the end):  “The [expletive] officials did a horrible job, the whole [expletive] game…I’m done talking to you [expletives].”  
  Vontaze Burfict (also penalized 15 yards; in response to nearly every question asked by reporters): “I don’t know.”  
  Defensive end Carlos Dunlap: "Bengals beat Bengals.”
  Bengals receiver A.J. Green: “You put in all this work for six months.  And then —  Nothing.” 

Katja and I numbingly watched all the post-game critiques we could find.  We turned off the TV about 1 a.m.  Our end of night conversation went something like this: 

K: I don't think I can be a Bengals fan anymore.

D: Me neither.  Do you think I should throw away my new Bengals sweatshirt?

K: No.  Just put it away. 

D: If I die tonight, my final wish is to be cremated.

K: Why would you die tonight?

D: A lot of people in Cincinnati are going to die tonight.  I could be one of them.

K: I don't think you’re going to die.

D:  I'm just saying, if I do die I want to be cremated.

K (who rejects the very idea of cremation):  All right, if you die I'll see that you're cremated. 

K (after a pause): If you’re cremated,  I'll mix your ashes with Mike and Duffy's.

D (enthusiastically):  Yes, yes.  That’s my final wish.  To have my ashes mixed with Mike and Duffy's.  

As it turned out, I made it through the night.  I talked to J by phone in the morning.  We decided that we would give our total allegiance to the Green Bay Packers.  That did make life more hopeful.  The Packers, though, have been really struggling on offense, and they're underdogs against the Redskins.  Just as I’m posting this, the Packer game has started.  If the Packers lose, I won’t even bother to die.  The crematorium is right down the street from our house.  I’m just going to walk down there and get in line. 

Love,

Dave

Good Times at Pensacola Beach

Dear George,

Katja and I are recently back from our holiday trip to visit our family in New Orleans.  We opted to drive the 800+ miles with an overnight stop near Birmingham, AL.  Celebrating Christmas with our 7-year-old grandchildren, V and L, was exciting, and Santa came through with a bonanza of gifts.  On the day after Christmas we drove to Pensacola Beach on the Florida Gulf coast where J and K had rented a condo for five days.  We haven’t been to Florida for some time, and it was a perfect holiday vacation.  Here are some Pensacola Beach scenes.

Love,

Dave

White sands.  I enjoy beach vacations the best of all, and the Pensacola area features some of the world’s best.  The water was chilly to all except the surfers in their wetsuits, but being on the beach in December in 70-degree weather was still a great treat for us wintry Cincinnatians.    

The resort.  J and K booked a condo for our group at the Beach Club in the heart of Pensacola Beach’s entertainment district.  The Gulf was right under our balcony window, and the children enjoyed the indoor pool as well. 

The town.  Pensacola Beach was largely undeveloped until its first tourist attraction, the Casino Resort, was built in 1931.  Now it’s one of the most popular vacation destinations on the Gulf Coast.  Visitors partake of swimming, sailing, snorkeling, fishing, parasailing, and surfing.  We enjoyed the seafood restaurants every evening.       

The pier.  The longest pier on the Florida Panhandle until a few years ago, the Pensacola Beach pier stretches 1471 feet out into the Gulf of Mexico.  It’s a popular fishing spot (red fish, Mahi Mahi, mackerel, flounder, etc.), and visitors can see dolphins and manatee.  The original wooden pier was built in the 1930’s and was reconstructed with concrete pilings after hurricane damage in the 1990’s. 

The bay.  Pensacola Bay, 13 miles long and 2.5 miles wide, lies between the city of Pensacola on the mainland to the north and Pensacola Beach on the island to the south.

The fort.  Fort Pickens on the western end of Santa Rosa Island was built between 1829 and 1834 to defend Pensacola Bay and the Pensacola Navy Yard.  It was occupied by Union forces during the Civil War and remained in use through World War II.  Today it’s operated by the National Park Service.  

Pensacola.  We spent an afternoon in downtown Pensacola, browsing in the art galleries and shops.  Pensacola (pop. 51,923) is the site of the first settlement in the United States, initially established in 1559 by Spanish explorer Tristan de Luna and 1400 inhabitants.  It’s nicknamed “The City of Five Flags” due to five governments having ruled it during its history (Spain, France, Great Britain, U.S.A., and the Confederate States of America).  

The fish market.  Joe Patti’s Seafood market began in the early 1930’s when Anne and Joe Patti sold fish from their front porch in Pensacola.  From the 1960’s to the early 1990’s the Patti market served all of the seafood restaurants on the Florida and Alabama gulf coast, though the family then decided to concentrate on their retail operation.  They have a huge selection of fresh fish, and TripAdvisor rates Patti’s #2 of 609 places to eat in Pensacola. 

The aviation museum.  The National Naval Aviation Museum, established in1962, is next door to the Naval Air Station in Pensacola.  The largest museum of its kind in the world, it contains over 130 restored fighting planes from the early 1900’s through the Vietnam War and beyond, representing the Navy, Marines, and Coast Guard.  It includes an IMAX theater where we saw a documentary on space flight. 

The Gulf at twilight.  The seashore, of course, changes in the course of the day.  Twilight is one of the prettiest times.  

Postscript.  It’s always comforting to return home, but now we miss our sweet family.  

V and L's Christmas Carol

The Players: V and L

Dear George,

Katja and I drove down to New Orleans to spend Christmas with J and K and our grandkids, V and L.  I’d written a short adaptation of Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol” for V and L to put on as a play for family and friends.  V, our 7-year-old granddaughter, played the part of Ebenezer Scrooge, and L, our 7-year-old grandson, did the parts of Bob Cratchit and the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Christmas Present, and Christmas Yet to Come.  Here’s the script.  The children did a great job.

Love,

Dave

Act One: At Ebenezer Scrooge’s office

Scrooge says, “Bah Humbug, Bob”

(Bob Cratchit is on stage, working at his desk.) 

Narrator:  It’s Christmas eve in London.  Bob Cratchit, Ebenezer Scrooge’s employee, is busy at work in Scrooge’s office.  It’s freezing cold.  Scrooge comes in the door, and Bob greets him.

(Scrooge enters) 

Bob:  Merry Christmas, Mr. Scrooge.  

Scrooge:  Merry Christmas?  Bah Humbug.  Christmas is for babies.

Narrator:  Bob is shivering because he is so cold.    

Bob (shivering and shaking):  I’m so cold, Mr. Scrooge.  Could I turn on the heat?

Narrator:  But Scrooge won’t turn on the heat. 

Scrooge:  Bah humbug, Bob.  Coal costs money.  You go back to work.   

Narrator:  Bob starts working but he really wants to go home on Christmas eve to be with his family and his son Tiny Tim.  

Bob:  Please can I go home, Mr. Scrooge?  My family misses me.  Tiny Tim misses me.  

Scrooge:  Bah humbug, Bob Cratchit.  You get to work.

(Bob shivers at his desk.  Goes through his papers.)

Narrator:  Finally Scrooge says it’s o.k. to go.  

Scrooge:  All right, Bob Cratchit.  You can go home to your family.

Bob:  Oh, thank you, Mr. Scrooge.  And Merry Christmas to you.  (Bob exits)  

Scrooge:  Merry Christmas?  Bah humbug!  

Narrator:  The end of act one.  (Scrooge exits) 

Act Two: The Ghost of Christmas Past

The Ghost tells Scrooge of his sad childhood

Narrator:  Scrooge comes home at midnight.  (Scrooge enters and sits down in his chair.)  Soon he is sound asleep in his chair.  (Scrooge starts snoring.)  

Narrator:  Then the Ghost of Christmas Past comes in.  (Ghost enters, waving his arms like a ghost.)  And Scrooge wakes up to see him.  (Scrooge wakes up and looks startled.) 

Scrooge:  Oh.  Who are you?   

Narrator:  The Ghost tells Scrooge who he is.  

Ghost (in an eerie voice):  I am the Ghost of Christmas Past.  I am here to tell you about your past life.

Scrooge:  (waves his arms)

Narrator:  The Ghost tells Scrooge about his sad childhood.

Ghost:  When you were a child, your parents didn’t love you.  

Narrator:  Scrooge was all alone at Christmas.  He was very lonely and very sad.  

Scrooge (crying):  My parents didn’t love me.  I was all alone.  I was so sad.  

Narrator:  And then when Scrooge grew up he fell in love with Belle.  But he couldn’t tell her.  

Ghost:  When you grew up you fell in love with Belle.  But you didn’t show her any love.  And she left you.

Narrator:  That made Scrooge so sad.  

Scrooge (crying):  Oh, I loved Belle.  But I couldn’t show her my love.  And she left me.  I am so sad.  (Cries some more) 

Narrator:  And then the Ghost of Christmas Past departed.

Ghost: (leaves, waving arms)

Narrator:  The end of Act Two.  (Scrooge leaves stage) 

Act Three: The Ghost of Christmas Present

The Ghost tells Scrooge of Tiny Tim’s illness

Narrator:  Scrooge is alone at Christmas eve.  He is sound asleep in his chair.  

Scrooge: (asleep in his chair, snoring)

Narrator: While Scrooge slept, the Ghost of Christmas Present arrived.  

(Enter: The Ghost of Christmas Present) 

Narrator: And Scrooge wakes up.

Scrooge:  Oh, who are you?

Ghost: I am the Ghost of Christmas Present.  

Narrator:  Scrooge asks where he is.

Scrooge:  Where am I?  What’s happening?

Narrator: The Ghost explains that they are at Bob Cratchit’s house.

Ghost:  We are at Bob Cratchit’s house.  (pointing to side of stage)  There is Bob Cratchit and his family.

Narrator:  Scrooge wonders who the little boy is.

Scrooge:  Who is that little boy?

Ghost:  That is Tiny Tim.  

Narrator:  Bob Cratchit is sad because he has no food for Tiny Tim.  Bob Cratchit is also sad because he has no gifts for his family.  Scrooge feels bad for them.  

Scrooge:  I feel bad.  They have no food.  They have no gifts.  

Narrator:  Tiny Tim says he doesn’t need Christmas gifts.  All he needs is love from his family.  Scrooge is impressed with how loving the Cratchits are.

Scrooge:  They are so loving.  Bob Cratchit is very loving.  Tiny Tim is very loving.

Narrator:  The Ghost tells Scrooge that Tiny Tim is very sick and that he may die.

Ghost:  Tiny Tim is very sick.  He will die unless Bob Cratchit gets some money to pay the doctor. 

Narrator:  And Scrooge is very upset.  

Scrooge:  Oh no.  Tiny Tim can’t die.  (Scrooge starts to cry.) 

The end of Act Three (the actors exit)

Act Four.  The Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come

Scrooge is dead

(Scrooge is asleep in his chair)  

Narrator:  Scrooge is awakened a third time by the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come who takes him on a journey.  (Ghost enters, and he and Scrooge walk around the stage.)  They soon come to a graveyard.  The first gravestone says “Tiny Tim.”  Scrooge is very sad.

Scrooge:  Oh no, Tiny Tim is dead.  That makes me so sad.

Narrator:  The Ghost explains that Tiny Tim’s family had no money to pay the doctor.

Ghost:  Bob Cratchit was so poor.  He had no money.  And Tiny Tim died.

Narrator:  They move on to the next gravestone.  It reads “Ebenezer Scrooge.”

Scrooge:  Oh no.  That’s my own gravestone. 

Narrator:  The Ghost explains that no one came to Scrooge’s funeral.

Ghost:  No one came to your funeral.  You didn’t have any friends.  You were all alone in the world. 

Scrooge (starts crying):  I was all alone.  No one came to my funeral.  I promise I will change my ways.   I will help everyone on Christmas. 

Narrator:  The end of Act Four (actors exit)  

Act Five: At Bob Cratchit’s house on Christmas morn

Scrooge gives Christmas gifts to Bob Cratchit

(Bob Cratchit on stage) 

Narrator: Bob Cratchit is home with his family.  Just then there is a knock on the door.

(Scrooge knocks on the door and enters) 

Scrooge:  Merry Christmas, Bob Cratchit.

Bob (surprised): Merry Christmas, Mr. Scrooge.  

Narrator: And Scrooge gives Bob Cratchit a turkey and presents for his family. 

Scrooge:  Here is a turkey for your Christmas dinner.  (Hands turkey to Bob)  And here are presents for your family.  (Hands presents to Bob)  Merry Christmas to you and Tiny Tim.  

Narrator:  Bob is very thankful.  

Bob (excited):  Thank you so much, Mr. Scrooge.  Come and have dinner with us.  You will always be a part of our family.

Scrooge:  Oh that makes me so happy!

Narrator:  And then Scrooge and Bob Cratchit do a line dance to celebrate the true meaning of Christmas.

(Dance steps: To the right, to the right, to the right, to the right; to the left, to the left, to the left, to the left; kick and kick and kick and kick; turn it all around, turn it all around)

           

Narrator:  And that is the end of the play.  In Tiny Tim’s famous words: “God bless us, everyone!” 

The players take a bow.  (Exit and return for a second bow.)   

The End